In our Basic English class we tried out an idea that I have used with success. Simply put, I took the meaning away from the subject of our paragraphs. I made up a word and that became the focus of our paragraph. Then, we worked through the paragraph acting as if our made up word/subject was a food. We brainstormed the list of the adjectives, which in this case were tastes and textures. Finally, we wrote our own paragraphs and learned how to make comments on a word document.
Topic: Discuss the good flavor of flupperbolts.
WORD
BANK: spicy/spiciness,
cheesy/cheesiness, hot/very hot, juicy, ice cream/creaminess, sweet/sweetness
Flupperbolts are good because they are cheesy, crunchy and salty. [i1] The most important taste of
flupperbolts is the cheesiness.[i2] Another important flavor of flupperbolts is the saltiness. [i3] An important texture of flupperbolts
is their crunchiness. [i4] In conclusion, all flupperbolts are
very flavorful. [i5]
Topic: Describe why your shoes are the best.
Word
Bank: brown, tan, black, sandals, white,
tennis shoes, boots, Jordan’s, DC’s, comfortable, expensive, cheap, nice, and
washable
There are many reasons why my shoes are the best. [i6] My shoes are comfortable and always
make my feet feel good. [i7] Secondly, my shoes are brown and they
match everything I wear. [i8] Finally, my shoes are washable and
that keeps them from smelling bad[i9] .
In
conclusion, my shoes are the very best shoes because they are mine. [i10]
Once all of this was completed, we were able to write another descriptive paragraph and we added the comments to label our paragraph parts. The formatting is a bit different, so only one student sample shows the comments. This has been a great first step!
Gloria
There are many reasons why my shoes are the best. They are comfortable. I like when they are different color and I likes snow boots and they are cute and nice and they are awesome and they are different kind of them in the world and I love house shoe they are soft and cuddly.
Austin
There are many reasons why my shoes are the best. First, my shoes are suede boots. They have laces and have (6) eyelets. Soles are oil resistant rubber. I believe that my shoes are cool. My shoes smell fresh because I wash my shoes. On Friday, my shoes will last about one year. My shoes are made for walking.Deon
There are many reasons why my shoes are the best. I am wearing DC’s shoes. My shoes stink and my shoes are BIG. Finally, my shoes are comfortable. The only reason I said my shoes stink is that way no one steals them. The reason why I said my shoes big I don’t need to worry about falling on my face. The reason I said my shoes are comfortable it because their foam.
Ashley
There are many reasons why my shoes are the best.[BAN1] My shoes are black, comfortable, nice washable. [BAN2] They match all my outfits[BAN3] . I don’t have to worry about them getting dirty easy because they are black and slip resistant.[BAN4] My shoes are nice and toasty in the inside and out.[BAN5] One thing is that they have little holes on top of my shoes they also have shoe laces that keep my foot in place[BAN6] . In conclusion my shoes are one solid black color. [BAN7] [BAN1]Topic scentence.
[BAN2]Supporting detail #1
[BAN3]Supporting detail #2
[BAN4]Supporting detail# 3
[BAN5]Supporting detail#4
[BAN6]Supporting detail #5
[BAN7]Conclusion!!!
